Dear President Bush,

I wanted to thank you for making everything so cut and dry for the American people. You let us know that if we do not support the war in Iraq, that we do not support the troops. You let us know that if we are not with you, then we are terrorists. You let us know that despite your pro-life stance and previously Republican dominated senate, that abortion will remain legal. In the most recent months, you have taught us what abstaining from alcohol means. You have let us know who matters most in society by continuing to grant tax breaks to the rich while more and more Americans become unemployed. I really appreciate the divisiveness that you have created for us. I used to love my neighbor until they ran over my political yard sign. Now I don't have to take them cookies at Christmas. What I will miss most about you is the ability to be cynical. As long as I have been old enough to vote, I have felt distant from the mistakes I watched my country make because I did everything I could to prevent your administration from claiming and maintaining power. I will now have to take responsibility for my vote and the actions of my chosen government. I hope now that you are relieved of your duties and no longer bound to your AA pledge, that you will take time to have a beer with all of those people who voted for you because they thought you would be fun.